The holidays can bring moments of magic — sparkling lights, familiar songs, cozy family gatherings. But for many parents and caregivers, they also bring full schedules, high expectations, sensory overload, and an endless to-do list. The season that’s meant to bring connection can easily leave our nervous systems on overdrive.
As parents and caregivers, we often focus on supporting our children through holiday stress: keeping routines somewhat consistent, preparing them for transitions, and helping them manage the emotional ups and downs of change. Yet we sometimes forget that our own regulation forms the foundation for how our children experience the season. When we feel grounded, calm, and connected to ourselves, we can co-regulate with them, providing a sense of safety that helps them settle more easily into the moment.
So what does regulation really mean? Regulation is our body’s ability to return to a place of neutrality after stress or stimulation. It’s not about staying calm all the time — it’s about noticing what’s happening inside us and finding ways to come back to center or a neutral state. In somatic work, regulation begins in the body, not the mind. The body leads the way through breath, movement, touch, and sensory experiences that signal safety to the nervous system.
Regulation starts with awareness — noticing subtle cues from our body before we reach the point of overwhelm. A racing heartbeat, shallow breath, or tightness in your body are invitations to slow down and reconnect. These small moments of noticing become portals back to neutrality and self-trust, allowing us to meet the season with more ease and authenticity.
Many of us know common suggestions for regulation — taking deep breaths, going for a walk, or carving out alone time. These can help, but sometimes our nervous system craves something more embodied, creative, or playful — something that brings us fully back to life rather than just calm.
Below are 10 somatic tools for parents and caregivers to stay grounded through the holidays. These ideas invite presence, curiosity, and connection amid the holiday chaos.
10 Somatic Tools to Support Holiday Regulation
- Self-hug
Wrap your arms around yourself, squeeze gently, and breathe. This simple act activates the body’s calming response and helps you feel safe in your own skin. - Dance it out
Put on your favorite song and move however your body wants. Movement releases built-up tension and reconnects you with yourself. - Water immersion
Step into a bath, shower, or even wash your hands slowly in warm water. Water helps reset the senses and invites a full-body exhale. - Holiday scent pause
Smell can be deeply regulating. Use a seasonal scent — cinnamon, orange, or pine — and take a slow inhale to ground yourself in the present moment. - Expressive scribbles
Grab a pen and paper and scribble out your stress. It doesn’t have to look like anything — the act of movement and expression helps emotions flow. - Micro-movement breaks
Jump, shake, stretch, or sway — short bursts of movement keep your energy from stagnating and help the body process stress. - Stress “externalization”
Give your tension a fun name, like your Tension Troll, and imagine sending it away with a flick of your hand. Playfulness helps release stress and invites humor into hard moments. - Ritual object
Keep a small item — a bell, ornament, or stone — that you touch or hold when you need to pause and breathe. Rituals create a sense of stability amid busyness. - Partnered touch or intimate connection
Share a mindful hug, gentle massage, or hand-hold with your partner. Physical connection co-regulates the nervous system and strengthens intimacy. - Solo intimate self-care
Take a few mindful moments to connect with your own body — through gentle touch, stretching, or self-massage. Tuning into your body helps release tension and restore energy.
The holidays can pull us in many directions — toward family obligations, traditions, and expectations. Yet true presence with our loved ones comes from within our own regulated body. When we tend to our inner world, we show up more available, patient, and connected — not just for our children, but for ourselves.
Staying rooted in connection means allowing ourselves to feel, to pause, and to return to our neutral state again and again. In the noise and activity of the season, these small moments of regulation are acts of deep love — quiet reminders that we deserve the same care and attunement we so readily offer to others.
Tovah Petra, MA, is a Somatic Practitioner and the creator of the Whole Family, Whole Child approach, where she helps parents of neurodivergent kids create emotionally safe, attuned, and connected homes — while also nurturing their own nervous systems, relationships, and intimate connection. Learn more at: www.tovahpetra.com
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